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This is not the norm


For all of you who have the best spouses ever, thanks for sharing. Just make sure they know it. Polls show that 99% of bloggers have a spouse that doesn't read their blog. So, make sure they know you love them and tell them so day other than Valentine's day too. But again, it is nice to hear that I'm not the only perfect husband out there. I was starting to wonder.

In commemoration of Valentine's day, I am going to write about myself, and not my wife. That's a twist. I am also going to write the things she does not necessarily "dig" about me. There are many. So this is pretty much my anti-normal Valentine's day list of things that you wouldn't see on a blog for Valentines day.

I'm late often and procrastinate always. (It's Feb 16th and I'm making my V-day post. Get it?)
I apparently place utensils in the incorrect drawer--but they are never in the incorrect drawer consecutively. Is that confusing? I apparently place lots of things in the wrong spot. Like deodorant, clothes, pizza cutters. I am the most unobservant creature on the planet, add that to a bad memory. I had a story to back this up, but I can't remember when it happened, who was there, what it involved, and why I even brought the subject up.

When I wash dishes I splash a lot. We're talking diluvian proportions here. I can't get out of bed before 7:30. I lie all the time. I can't get out of bed before 7:45. If I'm in a good mood I sing crazy songs to my kids and act way too mature for a {gulp} 30-year old. If I am in a bad mood I don't talk and don't want to be around people. I steal all the hot-water in the shower. All I do to get ready for bed is brush my teeth. I play Madden occasionally. I don't pay attention to many things my wife says and I will often abruptly leave the room to do something.